Once you have a child, everything changes: your perception of the world, your freedom as a single entity, your soul.

Everyone says that the birth of your children is the most wonderful experience of your life. I don't think that could be further from the truth; most likely, the most significant experience of your life, but not necessarily wonderful. For the female, it's incredibly challenging and exceedingly painful for hours, and incredibly dangerous. The baby comes out covered in bodily fluids, screaming, with a strange purple cord sticking out of its belly button. Don't get me wrong—I had some incredibly euphoric emotions, and the feeling of pride and an incredible sense of gratitude for my wife was undeniable, but it was a long, difficult, and challenging process.

The first time you hold your child, there is a very strange universal connection that unfolds immediately, and your soul and spirit change forever. The love starts to flow, and the past seems like a dream. However, the love is a love of instinct, of unity, of familiarity with your blood. Over time, you build and learn to love your children in an even deeper sense—the way that they begin to develop traits, their personality unfolds, they learn new skills, and perform new tasks on a daily basis, which is amazing. But they also begin to question their surroundings, to understand their own emotions—feelings of success, sadness, comfort, and happiness. At this stage, their love is also instinctual. You develop a bond and create memories of both good and bad times, but you have to work towards earning their love as well. It's a two-way street, and just because you birthed them doesn't give you the right to their love.

As they grow a bit older and start to talk, they make passing comments about the world and respond to cues, etc. But when they tell you they love you for the first time and pretty much every time after that, your heart warms, and for me, a sense of happiness overwhelms me. Raising a child is a never-ending journey, and constantly, you need to evolve, learn more skills, gain a deeper understanding of your children and their needs, wants, and goals. But you need to learn and develop far more within yourself because if you forget who you are, then who do they become?

I'm not saying having a child is the key to happiness, but investing in an unknown outcome just to be the best version of yourself and potentially contribute in whatever way you can to someone else's life is a beautiful thing. But jeez, when they hug your head as hard as they can, kiss you, and say 'I love you, Dad,' well, that does make me feel pretty happy.

Thanks,

Dean